Ontinyent – Moving to Spain? Help!

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Early June 2019 and our third visit of six this year to our new Spanish home in Ontinyent, Valencia province.

Deb and I were here for two weeks and determined to make this one a holiday. The two previous visits involved visits to the Notary, Ayuntamiento (town hall), lawyers office and builders merchants to organise work and finalise legitimising ourselves in Spain.

There were two things we had to sort out while we were here though. The first was a post office box. Having no address, we couldn’t get any official mail or order anything on-line for delivery. The second was the on-going ‘furnituregate’ debacle with Leroy Merlin and their inability to deliver furniture we had paid for back in February. We had planned another visit to their store in Gandia the day after our arrival.

We were getting used to the journey from the airport and an hour after setting off in our hire car we unlocked the gates to the house and drove up the drive. Our new pool and patio came into view and it looked outstanding, perfectly cleaned and so inviting. It was an amazing transformation.

Deb stopped the car and we both got out and walked around the pool area taking it all in. The area had been transformed and the photo’s Julian had sent didn’t do it justice. ‘That looks amazing,’ said Deb ‘Pedro has done a fantastic job.’ I kicked off my shoes and strolled bare foot around the patio. ‘These tiles are so cool.’ I said ‘It’s so hot but the tiles have no heat in them at all, and they look so good. Well worth the extra cost.’

We dragged ourselves away and drove to the house to open up. Shutters raised and windows opened for fresh air, although there was no musty or stale smell at all. It was just as we had left it. I connected the gas and turned the house electric on while Deb was putting the few things we had brought into the wardrobes. She then placed the sun lounges on the new pool patio and walked back up to the porch as I came out of the house. We both looked back on the pool area and fully realised how the work had transformed the view.

Perfect

Right, enough of this, we can wallow in the peace, quiet, fab views and of course the pool, later. Firstly we need supplies so it was off to our local Consum.

Uneventful shopping trip and then on to organise a post office box. You can either have P.O. box just for letters or one for parcel deliveries. We opted for a parcel facility as we wanted the ability to order items on-line if we couldn’t find them locally.

We weren’t sure what we needed documents wise so we took everything from passports to house deeds. This task was a little beyond our current linguistic skills so we had Google translate to hand. The young lady behind the counter had excellent English as it turned out but we did at least attempt some limited Spanish, which she helped us along with and it turned out to be quite a fun experience.

Feeling achieved, we spent the rest of the day relaxing in the sunshine and enjoying our new pool area.

The one and only remaining task we wanted to achieve on this visit was to arrange for our outdoor sofa set to be delivered. The following day we travelled to Gandia, again, to visit the store, again, and request, again, that they deliver our furniture during this visit.

The staff couldn’t have been more helpful and they organised a delivery in 4 days time. I think they were sick of the sight of us by now. They arranged for an English speaking driver to make the delivery and he would call us an hour before arrival to make sure we were in. ‘Don’t worry, we won’t be going anywhere that day.’ Deb assured them.

Before we returned to Ontinyent we took a detour to one of the beaches in Gandia, had a walk along the boardwalk and dipped our feet in the Med.

It was turning out to be a very positive day and to top it all, when we had nearly reached our house on the return journey, we spotted Josef on the narrow back road. Now I had a lengthy conversation, in Spanish I hasten to add, with Josef on our last visit and we stopped so I could introduce Deb to him.

Deb was in there first. ‘Hola Josef’, she said, ‘como estas?’ ‘Muy bien.’ he replied with a really friendly smile on his face. ‘Me llamo Deb.’ She said. ‘Josef’, he replied shaking hands with Deb, followed by something neither of us understood. Awkward silence ensued with big friendly grins all round. Deb finally said, Adios Josef.’ We leapt back in the car and drove home. ‘That was exciting.’ She said. ‘Abrupt, but exciting. I’m sure we’ll have longer conversations soon.’

Some days later, our furniture arrived as arranged, delivered by an English speaking driver and within an hour we had the sofa and table set up on the patio. I couldn’t wait to photograph it so I could post it in my blog but I am no David Bailey, as you can no doubt tell from the quality and standard of my previous photo’s, and I completely buggered it up but didn’t realise until we returned to the UK. So that will be a treat I will leave until next time.

The rest of our June holiday was uneventful and relaxing, just what we needed after our last visits. We are not really the active types and are quite happy in our own company just making the most of the down time and re-charging our batteries. When we are here for longer periods though and eventually, permanently, we intend to spend our time exploring the Country we have chosen as our home.

We had a visit from Julian and Marijse to see how we were and to make sure everything was ok with the pool. ‘Perfect. Pedro has done a wonderful job.’ Deb told them. ‘We now have more work to discuss though.’

And so it was we finished our last visit. The next blog I will be writing while we are actually at our Spanish home as we are now up to date. The last seven weeks back in the UK have been eventful but I will touch on those again.

Later this morning I will be leaving messages on my mobile and landline saying that I will not be available until 27th August, ‘but please leave a message.’ I am though safe in the knowledge that Josh is looking after things while I’m away.

Deb and I will head out for a late lunch, then a couple of hours sleep before setting off for Luton around midnight tonight.

Ontinyent, here we come.

Hola Josef.

Normal service resumed and back to our March 2019 visit to Casa en trébol.

As I was unloading, turning on the electric, connecting the gas and opening
the windows to get some fresh air in, Deb was trying to get through to Leroy
Merlin with no success at all. ‘They’re not picking up,’ she said, ‘I could be on the phone for ages. Tell you what, how about we go shopping and I’ll try later.’ ‘Great, let’s do that.’ I replied. Shopping, fantastic. I can try out my new Spanish skills.

We drove down into San Rafael where our favourite Consum store is, parked up and strolled confidently into the store. ‘Hola, buenos dias.’ I called to a familiar looking checkout assistant. ‘Hola, buenos dias.’ She called back in greeting. It felt good to be recognised and acknowledged in our local store.

We knew where most items were located from our frequent previous visits and proceeded to stock up on the weeks shopping. It was mainly the food for the week as most of our dry goods were purchased during our last visit. These were all stored nicely in our larder at home.

We had everything we needed in the trolley so the last item was ice. The ice freezer was nowhere to be seen so I would have to enquire. Brilliant. Time for the lessons to be put into practice. I approached a pleasant looking lady stacking shelves. ‘Donde esta el hielo?’ I said confidently, asking the shop assistant where the ice was. The response was a complicated mix of words I had no understanding of with lots of arm waving and pointing. I looked at her blankly and she said quietly with an indulgent smile and in accented English, ‘near the fish.’ ‘Muchas gracias.’ I mumbled and snook off with a sheepish grin. More lessons would be needed

Deb had more luck at checkout with requests for ‘tres bolsas por favor’
resulting in 3 bags being presented. The assistant tried to get us to sign up
for a Consum rewards card, so we took the Application form as it was easier
than trying to explain it was pointless applying as we had no address to send the card to. For those who missed my last hugely popular blog, our house is so rural it has no address, just a plot number and a vague description of the approximate area it’s in.

Return home, shopping stowed away and drinks prepared, we settled on our patio, Deb on the phone while I was admiring our view and immersing myself in the peace and quiet.’Bloody Leroy Merlin,’ Deb suddenly yelled, shattering the tranquillity. ‘I get an automated response giving me five options, none of which I understand, so I’ve chosen them all at least once and nobody ever answers the phone. We’re going to the Gandia store tomorrow and organise getting this furniture delivered.’ ‘OK hun.’ I said quietly.

Following a lovely night in front of a roaring fire and a really good nights
sleep we set off to Gandia the following morning. It’s an enjoyable
journey through rolling countryside of olive groves and interesting little
settlements. We arrived 40 minutes later and proceeded to the outdoor furniture dept.

Our newly acquired Spanish language skills were inadequate for this
particular scenario so we had to locate an English speaking assistant. As it
turned out, the sofa set that we paid for on our last visit was still in
Madrid, but now we were back in Spain this could be organised for delivery.
However, the only day available was our last full day before we returned to the UK. So another week of sitting around on our inherited crappy white plastic furniture. Deb was not a happy bunny but at least she had a comfy sun lounger.

When we were leaving the store Deb said to me, ‘We must be close to the beach, how do you fancy dipping your toes in the Med while we’re here?’ ‘Great idea.’ I replied. So off we went to one of the lovely beaches in Gandia, wandered along the boardwalk and yes, dipped our feet in the Med.

We passed the time on the way back to our new home sticking imaginary pins in imaginary effigies of Leroy Merlin logistics managers. We felt somewhat better when we arrived back. Anyway we had a meeting with Julian and Marijse the following day at a local builders merchants to choose patio tiles for our pool conversion works so it was something positive to look forward to.

Nightly activity of soft music background, sat on the patio in the peaceful, darkening Spanish evening then retreat to the lounge where we sit around the roaring log fire, sipping our drinks and quietly planning our future.

The following day was like being back in the UK, cloudy, grey and a light drizzle. We arrived at the builders’ merchants, me dressed appropriately in flip flops, shorts, flimsy t-shirt and a thin jacket. Deb was dressed similarly. We strode quickly across the merchants yard leaping over puddles and into the warehouse where Julian and Marijse met us. ‘I think we’ll need to bring some more suitable clothing next time we come out here.’ I said to Deb. ‘Agreed,’ she said, shivering. ‘We’ll bring a hold suitcase with a lot more clothes and leave them here.’

I’m surprised Julian and Marijse had time to sell any houses through their agency, Loshildickos, the amount of time they spent with us. We did try to not take up too much of their time though and made our tile choice quite quickly. Our choice was going to increase the cost slightly so we agreed a maximum budget and arranged to make a payment to them the following day. The work would begin after this visit and be completed by our next holiday in June.

Back home the weather had cheered up so we sat on one of our patios and enjoyed the remainder of the day in sunshine.

The following day we had to get a payment to the Loshildickos office but we also had a delivery coming from Leroy Merlin. ‘I’ll go to the office,’ said Deb, ‘if you want to stay here in case they turn up.’ ‘Ok,’ I replied, ‘I hope to have it all set up for you when you get back.’ Off she went down the drive and into Town.

I couldn’t settle so went for a stroll out of the gates and up the stone track away from the house. In the distance and walking towards me came a gnarly and wizened old Spanish man, looking at me with a hint of interest tinged with suspicion. I couldn’t very well turn round and go back as it would seem rude, so I took a deep breath, smiled, waved and said loudly ‘Hola, buenos dias.’ He wandered over to me with a slight smile on his face. ‘Hola, buenos dias.’ He replied. ‘Como estas?’ How are you, I asked. ‘Bien, bein.’ He replied more enthusiastically. ‘Soy Inglais. Hablo un poco Espańol.’ I’m English. I speak a little Spanish I explained. ‘Me llamo Rob.’ ‘Me llamo Josef.’ He replied and we shook hands smiling. ‘Mi Casa.’ I said pointing at our new home in the distance. He pointed at a nearby house and mumbled something with Casa in it and assumed he was one of our neighbours.

By now my Spanish language arsenal was near empty and my only linguistic ammunition was to ask him where the ice was or if he had any bolsas, neither of which seemed appropriate in the middle of the countryside. We both stood there just smiling at each other and after a few more awkward seconds I just said ‘Adios Josef.’ waved and strode purposefully back home, confident in the knowledge I had just had my first Spanish conversation with a local neighbour. Result.

On Debs return I was still on a high following my lengthy dialogue with Josef. ‘No furniture then?’ She said. ‘No,’ I replied, ‘but I did have a conversation with Josef, our neighbour, who doesn’t speak a word of English and I think we got on rather well.’ ‘I can’t believe you met a neighbour and I wasn’t there.’ she said sitting down on a white plastic chair.’ ‘Don’t worry,’ I replied, ‘we drive past his house every time we go out so I’m sure we’ll see him again.’ ‘How did the conversation go?’ She asked with a grin. ‘Great.’ I said. ‘A little limited obviously but it was an experience.’

Our last night was all to soon upon us. ‘Still no word from Leroy Merlin.’ Deb said, shifting uncomfortably on her white plastic chair on the porch. ‘We’ll have to go back to Gandia when we’re here in June and either get it delivered or demand a refund.’ ‘OK,’ I said. ‘It’s a nice drive and we can have a trip to the beach.’ ‘You always see the positive don’t you?’ She replied.

..and here’s one you could have had, if you’d ordered it somewhere else.

The following morning we closed up the house and set off to Valencia airport for a journey back to UK home. We were getting used to this now and it was no where near as difficult to drag ourselves away. Only 7 weeks to our next visit, and it was for a whole 2 weeks. ‘Pool will be complete by our next trip and we will have furniture if it’s the last thing I do.’ said Deb.

Hmmm, we’ll see.

Work? Oh you mean that bit between the holidays?

We arrived back on the Thursday, getting home in the early evening. Mood was upbeat as we had discussed all the way back what we were going to achieve during our next visit in 4 weeks.

I have to point out here that as soon as we had agreed on a completion date on our Spanish home, Deb had hit the internet and organised a few visits during 2019. When I say a few….well, firstly was a 5 day visit that we had just returned from following the completion, she then booked a 7 day visit 4 weeks later at the end of March, this was to be our next trip. Following that one we had a 14 day holiday in June, a 9 day trip in August for our Anniversary, a 14 day holiday the last week of September to the first week in October and finally a 7 day, pre-Christmas jolly the week before Christmas.

Contrary to popular belief, you don’t get the flight bargains by waiting until the last minute. Deb has an App that informs her as soon as EasyJet flights are released. She is then on it with a vengeance and has saved us well over a thousand pounds this year alone by being organised, planning our breaks away and booking flights early. Well, that saving is over 6 holidays and who in their right mind takes 6 holidays in a year?

Fortunately I work for myself and can dictate my own holidays, although I still have a commitment to my clients so I can see a lot of late nights and early mornings this year. Deb was another story though, she is employed, but as a Contractor, so she can take as many holidays as she wants but she won’t get paid for them. I don’t think though that her boss had an inkling she would be taking in the region of 45 days off work during the year. It helped that he’s just a figurehead and a clueless, unprofessional buffoon who doesn’t have a handle on the operation of the business and relies on suitably qualified subordinates to get him unscathed through each day. He never twigged when Deb kept sending in her holiday request forms. We were both therefore looking forward to our March trip completely unconcerned about our holidays and focused on works that needed prioritising.

Primary project was the pool renovation. The pool, using the term very loosely, was an old water deposit. This would have been used as a water source for the property before it was attached to a mains supply. The water deposit was about 4m x 3m and 1.5m deep. It had been painted by the previous owner and they fitted a rudimentary filtration system. The patio around was paved and had a ‘tasteful’ gazebo frame cemented in. As difficult as this would obviously be, we were convinced we could enhance this area still further.

Firstly, we had to decide who would be the lucky benefactor of our generosity when we offered up the gazebo frame on a ‘free to good home’ basis. We only knew Julian and Marijse and they didn’t want it, unsurprisingly, so Pedro would have to cart it away for us.

The next discussion was whether we had a full pool installation carried out or adapt the existing water deposit as just a dip pool. ‘Chances are,’ I said, ‘we will only be able to use an unheated pool from about May to October.’ ‘That’s right,’ replied Deb, ‘and the most we will be out here during these months is about 5 weeks.’ I thought about this and said, ‘It seems like a pointless expense at this stage to have a full pool installed when we will only use it for about 5 weeks of the year.’ ‘I agree.’ Deb said.

It was therefore decided that for the next 3 to 4 years, before we retired to our little idyll, a dip pool would suffice. We could look at installing a new pool from scratch when we moved permanently. ‘I know what will work for our pool,’ Deb said, ‘a couple of steps down to a platform, partially under water, then a few more steps down into the pool.’ ‘Ok,’ I said, ‘it sounds interesting. Not sure how you will get that across to Julian.’ Deb then researched small pools, sourced a few example photo’s and sent these to Julian. We asked him to get prices from Pedro for transforming our hole in the ground to a really welcoming dip pool.

Deb’s pool idea.
You’ll need lots of imagination

While Pedro was working out how to polish a turd, we re-commenced our Spanish lessons each Saturday. We turned up at our little school and were greeted by a new student, Julie. Similar age to us, roughly and very talkative and lively. Having a new person in the group worked really well and came as a useful distraction in the increasing hostility between myself and Phil. We had started off on the right foot but as the first couple of lessons had progressed she seemed to have a little difficulty when we were asked a question by Beckie, our teacher, and I had the audacity to get it right before her. ‘Swot’ and ‘Teachers Pet’ I used to get from under her breath, but said in a jokey manner. You can take the girl out of the playground but not the playground out of the girl. No matter, I’m a big boy, I can rise above such ridiculous trivialities.

Following the completion on our Spanish property, along with Alan and Phil completing on theirs the week before, Beckie decided to structure the lessons more around real situations, including shopping and eating out. I got this, I could apply it and it made sense. It was hugely useful and went some way to offsetting the anxiety of the supermarket checkout. Mind you, the anxiety was only on my part, Deb thrived on the experience and would quite happily ‘have a go’ at communicating with what seemed like appropriate words. If she didn’t know the Spanish word she would say it in English with a Spanish accent. The poor person she was addressing must think she was taking the mickey out of them. I wouldn’t know whether to laugh or stick my head in a bolsa, that’s Spanish for bag by the way. So it was with a huge amount of relief that we dealt with these situations.

Very soon, and with confidence, we could book a table at a restaurant, in smoking or non smoking, inside or outside and for whatever number of people. The mysteries of the menu written only in Spanish were also a thing of the past. We could wander round Consum asking for a wide variety of different foods, ask the checkout assistant for however many (bolsas) bags, and also understand the price when quoted to us. I was determined on our next visit to surprise and amaze with my new found knowledge and converse like a local.

Deb was coming on brilliantly, and what little she struggled with I seemed to thrive on, so between us we would be able to take on the world. Well, the Spanish speaking part of it anyway.

Our classmates were coming on too. Julie seemed to progressing nicely, Phil was basking in her own magnificence when she got something right, which was surprisingly infrequent considering this would be the second time she’d been through this course. Yes, I know, it’s a petty comment but some people bring it out in you. Then there was Alan, I liked Alan, but he came across as if he just couldn’t be arsed with it all. I think he was dragged along by Phil every week to keep her company. He either didn’t do his homework or he’d spend 5 mins in the car outside doing it before the lesson started. I understood why this was when he told me their neighbours all spoke English, where they had bought there house was a touristy place so everyone spoke English as well and you didn’t need Spanish to get by on a day to say basis.

But then why bother? It was Beckie I felt sorry for. Teaching is a vocation and the ability to deliver lessons and share hard earned knowledge shouldn’t be wasted on folk who haven’t got an interest. We’ll that’s what I think.

Deb and I would throw ourselves into our homework on the Saturday afternoon after class or on the Sunday. Then we have on-going revision during the week and have a refresh just before travelling to class the following week. It’s important to us that we get a grasp of the language. Julie came each week with the same upbeat attitude as well and would be clutching a huge tardis like bag, from which she would retrieve all manner of books, pens and reference materials in readiness to absorb more knowledge. We three alone had enough enthusiasm and motivation to fill a small classroom. Ability was a little lacking in my case but I tried to balance this out with my effort.

In the meantime, in between our weekly learning experience and my battle of wills and maturity with Phil, the pool refurbishment quote had landed from Pedro. It came in just shy of 5,000€ including tax, but is that good, bad or what? I had no idea. They would be installing Deb’s platform and steps, tiling the whole of the inside of the pool and the patio area round it, installing new pump, filter, jets, skimmer and er… other pooly bits, so it sounded quite reasonable but a little bit more than we had budgeted for. ‘It needs doing,’ said Deb, ‘we’ll need it in the Summer.’ ‘OK,’ I replied, ‘I’ll arrange for us to meet Julian and Pedro when we go back to the house and we can organise the work to start.’

A few days before we were due to return to Spain, Deb was in work and talking to a colleague about the pool reurb to be arranged during our next visit, when her boss overheard the conversation. ‘Are you off again?’ He said. ‘Yes,’ she replied, ‘You remember you signed it off before Christmas?’ Glazed, vacant look took over as the internal cogs slowly moved into action. ‘Oh yes, that’s right,’ he said, followed by, ‘I think it may be an idea to get a Planner for the office wall so everyone knows who’s away and when.’ ‘Great idea.’ Deb said, cringing at the thought of all her holidays for the year being on show for all the world to see. ‘I’ll get onto it as soon as I get back to work.’ Like that was going to happen.

Two days later and we were airport bound. Valencia and Ontinyent here we come again.

Feathering the Nest

The following morning after our first night in our new home, we sat on the porch, tea and coffee in hand and watching the view . ‘I will never tire of this.’ Deb said. ‘The views are spectacular and listen to the peace and quiet, there is not a sound.’ It was true, the odd tweet from a bird, but it was just still. ‘A bit cloudy this morning though.’ I replied. ‘I hope it breaks up.’ Deb glanced up at the lonesome, fluffy little cloud which was spoiling the otherwise uninterrupted blue sky and giggled. ‘Take a photo,’ she said, ‘and send it Josh saying the weather is terrible here.’ Photo and message duly sent and sarcastic reply received 5 minutes later from our son in university in a very soggy Newcastle.

We sat there deep in thought for a few minutes. ‘These chairs are so uncomfortable.’ I said. ‘I won’t be sitting in these for long.’ We were now the proud owners of the ubiquitous white plastic table and chair set. ‘Furniture is on the long list of things we need,’ said Deb, ‘along with sun loungers, a new fly screen for the front door, a vacuum cleaner and we need to get the Wifi sorted, I can’t keep using my phone.’ ‘Consider that dealt with,’ I replied, ‘Julian said he will organise the Wifi and the chap is coming out today to fit it. There has been so much going on I forgot to tell you.’ ‘Brilliant,’ she said.

Wifi man was coming out late afternoon, accompanied by Julian and Marijse, as much for translation skills as to see how we were getting on. That left us the rest of the day to organise a few things. Before we could leave though a figure appeared on our drive. Approx age, 60, but lively with it as he had managed to climb over the gate I had locked the night before. He had no English and, apart from introducing ourselves and asking how he was, we had no Spanish. He was also hard of hearing with poor eyesight so Google translate was useless. We managed to work out that he was our neighbour, that he did the gardening and that he wanted 30€ for this service. We couldn’t work out whether the 30€ was for a month, a week, a day or an hour and we only managed to get rid of him after it became obvious he was getting no money out of us. ‘We’ll ask Julian about this.’ I said to Deb.

First task in town was our bank account. We had arranged for Mayte, our lawyer, to meet us at a branch of Caixa bank to pick up all our account paperwork. She had established the account using the Power of Attorney and wanted to finalise everything for us. We then had a drive round town looking for somewhere to purchase garden furniture and stumbled across a large showroom called Gandiablasco which sold everything for the outdoor lifestyle. We knew we were out of our financial depth when the sales person unlocked and opened the door, quite openly looked us up and down, deemed we were suitable clientele, then stood back and allowed us entry. Then immediately locked us in. We wandered round awkwardly perusing the highly uncomfortable looking, but horrendously expensive, modern furniture. Even if we had a limitless budget I wouldn’t purchase this kind of furniture, it was just designed to look the part, practicality, comfort and functionality were not even a consideration. ‘Let’s get out here.’ Said Deb. ‘I’m right behind you.’ I replied. The sales assistant smiled with that kind of patronising smirk that all high end sales people have as they are thinking, ‘I was right, there is no chance they can afford anything in here. Stick to Carrefour where you belong.’ Pompous arse.

‘Right,’ I said, ‘I’ve had enough of this, the sun is over the yard arm so shall we hit our patio, get on our cheap plastic chairs and treat ourselves to a few drinks before the visitors arrive?’ ‘Good idea,’ Deb responded, ‘let’s make the most of it.’

Julian and Marijse turned up a few hours later with WiFi man in tow. Position of aerial established, we proceeded to demolish another bottle wine while the works progressed. After an hour Casa èn Trėbol was connected to the world wide web.

Julian and Marijse really are lovely people, so helpful and considerate with a huge wealth of local knowledge that they were, and still are, more than willing to share. We discussed outdoor furniture, laughed about Gandiablasco, and covered gardening and works we wanted to carry out, starting with the pool. ‘I’ll get Pedro down to give you a price for developing the existing pool area.’ Said Julian. ‘He can schedule the work around your visits and have it ready for the Summer.’ ‘Perfect.’ Said Deb. They also pointed us in the direction of a store called AKI in Xativa for outdoor furniture. This is like a B&Q or Homebase, in other words, more affordable.

We had another glorious night sat around the roaring fire, quaffing huge amounts of alcohol in our on-going celebration and making future plans. First plan was to go to AKI and get some comfortable furniture. ‘For now,’ said Deb, ‘we need a sofa set with a table for the porch and a couple of sun loungers for the patio.’ I agreed. ‘That’ll do for now,’ I said, ‘we can get anything else as we feel we need it. If we can find the right furniture tomorrow, it could be ordered and possibly delivered before we leave.’ Oh but it should be that simple.

We used our new WiFi to locate the store, but it turned out they had been taken over by a company called Leroy Merlin and the store was having a re-fit prior to opening. ‘So,’ I said, ‘Leroy Merlin is like a bigger B&Q, but that store isn’t open yet. Where is the next nearest one?’ ‘Gandia,’ Deb said ‘about a 40min drive.’ This was getting ridiculous. All you have to do in the UK is drive to the nearest garden centre, Homebase or B&Q, with at least one of those a maximum of 5 minutes away, and order your outdoor furniture…..and the UK has crap weather!! Right, Gandia here we come.

Around an hour later we entered Leroy Merlin in Gandia and located, within this massive building, the outdoor furniture area. We picked the sun loungers, a 7 seater ‘L’ shaped sofa set with table and a couple of stools and a humongous parasol.

After finding an English speaking assistant we proceeded to order our chosen furniture. The assistant enquired if we were taking it all with us. No, we aren’t taking it all with us as it won’t fit into our woefully inadequate rental Fiat 500, it will need to be delivered. ‘What is your address?’ The assistant asked. Believe it or not, our house does not have an address, it has a plot number and a vague description of it’s location for Land Registry purposes only, but address? No.

This was then the subject of an hour’s discussion with our pigeon Spanish, his passable English and Google translate to organise delivery. It would be in two days time, to a property they had no address for and, the chances were, delivered by a driver with no English speaking ability, who may well call us first. Why??? We parted with over 2,000€ with absolutely no confidence we would ever see the furniture, or money, ever again.

Two days of peace, quiet and indulgence followed with all talk of pool, gardening and plans of retirement.

A phone call came through on our penultimate day from a chap announcing, in pretty good English, that he had a delivery for us from Leroy Merlin but didn’t have a clue where we were. Fortunately, a decision had been made at the store to send a delivery driver with a grasp of our language as we didn’t have theirs. We arranged to meet him in the car park of Aldi on the main road a few miles away. He followed us back to our unaddressed abode and proceeded to drop off two sun lounges, and a humongous parasol, but no sofa set.

‘Where is the rest of our furniture?’ Said Deb. Apparently it was coming from Madrid and would be delivered the following week. Obviously we wouldn’t be there next week so, after lengthy discussions, it was decided the furniture should be dropped at the Gandia store and delivered during our week’s visit when we were back in March. Famous last words.

Final night sat round a roaring fire and we were all packed for an early dash to Valencia airport in the morning. ‘Have you enjoyed the last few days,’ enquired Deb, ‘and have they lived up to expectations?’ ‘Lived up to and surpassed.’ I said. ‘There is a bit to do here to make it right for our retirement but we’ll get it done and enjoy all of it.’ More famous last words.

The following morning was emotional as we closed up the house, and turned everything off in readiness to leave. Gates were locked and we made our way to the main road. ‘We’ll be back in 4 weeks.’ I said to Deb. ‘It’ll feel like an age,’ she replied tearfully. ‘I’m missing it already.’ It was surreal driving to the airport knowing we had our very own piece of Spain waiting for us to return.

2017. The Year of Frugal Living

Views from the patio

After some extensive discussions during our Lanzarote holiday and over Christmas, we started 2017 with a positive attitude. Simon, from Azahar Properties, took the news surprisingly well that we couldn’t get a mortgage and we told him we would be back in a year or so, fully financially refreshed. I think, hope, that Simon didn’t see us as time wasters/tyre kickers as we spent our own money on the visit after carrying out our own research and not just appearing on A Place in the Sun.

Views from the terrace

We considered our plans were well thought out and structured. We had made some purchases on 0% interest free credit a few years before during a refurbishment of our house and these were due to finish in early 2017. My business was hit pretty hard during the financial crisis and it took us a few years to get back on our feet following this dark period. But work still needed doing on our home so major things like kitchen and windows were put on 0% interest as we didn’t have the spare cash. We then planned to pay off credit cards as quickly as possible and clear all other outstanding debts during the year. We thought this achievable because of the year on year growth of my business, getting back to ‘pre-crash’ levels.

We also opted to start shopping at Aldi and Lidl rather than M&S and Sainsbury. This was inspired as we found the quality of fresh fruit, veg and meat were, a lot of the time, superior to the big name supermarkets. Note, we still do part of our weekly shopping at Aldi or Lidl as the savings are phenomenal.

We had a goal and the motivation to achieve it. Martin Lewis would have been proud of us if he knew half of our money saving measures. This was our future at stake.

Deb, in the meantime, was constantly watching ‘our’ property, as she called it, on a nightly basis. ‘It’s still there.’ She’d inform me every evening after searching the Azahar Property website again. ‘Don’t worry,’ I’d say, ‘nobody is going to buy that one, it’s too far into the country and secluded. There aren’t many people out there like us.’ Guess what? There was at least one. Sometime in, I think March, the property was indicated as ‘Sold’. Devastation knocked on the door again, Deb was distraught. ‘What are we going to do now?’ She cried ‘That property was perfect for us.’ ‘It obviously wasn’t meant to be hun.’ I replied, ever the pragmatist. ‘That can’t be the only one that is right for us and what this experience has achieved is giving us a benchmark to judge others by.’ ‘You’re right,’ she said, ‘let’s get out there and carry on looking.’ ‘I think we should look in a different area of the same region,’ I said, ‘I love it and I think we should explore further afield.’ Deb agreed and she started researching again.

We usually take three holidays each year, 7-10 days each, and always in a detached villa because we enjoy our privacy. However, 2017 being the year of the frugalist, yes I promise it is a real word and I’m attempting to have it included in the Chinese calender, we had decided to reduce this to two holidays. Aldi and Lidl are one saving but having less than two holidays is unthinkable. We, or should I say Deb as I’m not allowed to get involved, arranged 2 holidays to Javea on the Northern Costa Blanca, one in June and one in October. The reasons for two holidays here were twofold, firstly to have a holiday, obviously, and secondly to do a little exploring of the inland area from here. You can tell we were confident we could satisfy the affordability criteria for a mortgage by the end of this year.

Fast forward to June and our first visit of the year to Javea, via Alicante unfortunately, and back to battered luggage and long queues. The drive North from the airport takes you through some dramatic countryside, but none more dramatic than the view of Benidorm. It appears out of nowhere and is just alien to its surroundings with high rise tower blocks and hotels with a diversity of design having no sympathy at all to their natural surroundings. Further North, past Altea, Calpe and Moraira, all well showcased on A Place in the Sun, to Benissa and then towards the coast through picturesque valleys to Javea. The particular villa Deb had booked was near Cap de la Nau just South of Javea town. It was on an urbanisation of detached villas and this one had outstanding panoramic views of the Mediterranean from a raised, prominent and, more importantly, private plot. A great base for a holiday and also to do a little exploring inland at areas and properties.

We like Javea for a holiday as it’s calm and relaxing with all amenities nearby. The lovely and well maintained beach also has a sweeping promenade serviced by a host of bars and restaurants. Slightly further North and the beach continues to the Port and the main shopping area which is vibrant with a huge range of shops. If you find your way to the old part of town you will be there for the day easily, surrounded by a wealth of history and character. ‘Sounds idyllic.’ I hear you say. It is, but the properties are horrendously expensive, everyone you come across is English, which is also the dominant language and it is incredibly pretentious. Local English residents have this smug look about them and tend to look down their nose at the tourists. We don’t spend a great deal of time in town, apart from the odd morning beach walk, we tend to prefer the privacy of the villa. Even had we been able to afford it, we wouldn’t purchase a property in Javea.

We spent a couple of days exploring inland towns, avoiding the aforementioned Altea, Calpe and Moraira. Mainly because we were looking for something inland but also we felt we knew the towns so well as we’d seen them so often on A Place in the Sun. In fact we have seen them so frequently the chances are we would recognise most of the residents from the programme. We went through Jalon to Orba, Pego and then up into the mountains on roads full of cyclists, towards Muro de Alcoy. ‘The scenery is stunning,’ said Deb. ‘It is,’ I replied, ‘this is the sort of area we’ve been looking for. Look at the views and the groves of oranges, lemons, olives and whoever knows what else. It’s amazing.’ Not that impressed with Muro de Alcoy though unfortunately, it just didn’t have that vibrant town feel to it. ‘We want to live near a town,’ said Deb, ‘that we enjoy visiting for either shopping or socialising. Somewhere we feel offers the right mix of modern and traditional with all the facilities, and I don’t think this is it.’ ‘I’ve got to agree,’ I said, ‘but I definitely think we are in the right area.’ ‘Absolutely.’ She said.

Back in the UK and our loans were disappearing, credit cards getting paid off, business was looking good and we were confident our fiscal diet would make us an attractive proposition to the banks. Deb, in the meantime, was scouring our new found area inland from Javea. Properties were being sent to us thick and fast by agents as well as regular e-mails from Kyero and Think Spain. There was no point in viewing properties until we were confident we could satisfy mortgage criteria as we didn’t want to waste anyones time but it didn’t stop us looking at areas for when we were in a position to purchase. Deb was concentrating on the area to the North of Muro de Alcoy up to L’Olleria and Xativa. ‘There is some beautiful countryside in this area and the towns are a good size.’ said Deb. I replied, ‘Sounds just what we’re looking for. How about we take a drive up in October when we’re back in Javea?’ ‘I was just thinking the same thing.’ she said.

Javea in October is a more quiet affair as it’s out of the main holiday period. Our villa this time was again in the Cap de la Nau area but a little nearer to Javea. The promised secluded villa, wasn’t. Next door villa had a first floor balcony which overlooked our pool and some of the garden but we got some privacy if we squeezed behind the outdoor shower. Fortunately, the people who were renting it left the day after we arrived and no one else took up residence during our stay. Perfect.

We had a very relaxing week apart from one day we spent investigating the area South of Xativa. Xativa has a population of around 30,000 and all the usual amenities you would expect from a town of this size. It also has an interesting history going back to Roman times. We drove South through undulating countryside surrounded by groves of all varieties with outstanding views. ‘Now this is lovely,’ said Deb, ‘I can see us being in an area like this.’ ‘I agree.’ I replied. ‘I love this area and you have the large town of Xativa fairly close as well. I think this area deserves some research when we get back home.’

Deb was on the case as soon as we returned and started her research. She was looking South of Xativa when she said. ‘What about Ontinyent? Largish town with a population if approx 35,000, a bit more compact than Xativa. Looks like a really good mix of old, historical areas with a vibrant and modern looking town centre.’ Deb loves doing the Google Streetview walks through places. ‘Sounds good.’ I said. ‘So the town would be large enough to offer all the amenities?’ ‘Looks that way,’ she replied, ‘I can see a hospital, shopping centre and some nice open plazas.’ She delved further and into the surrounding area and we were really impressed. ‘I’m going to see what property is available in this area. It looks great.’

She searched local estate agents and started looking through the offerings of Carbonell Inmobilliaria (translated as real estate as we had come to learn) and Mangolink Property who, although based in Murcia, had quite a lot of properties in the Ontinyent area. ‘Do you think we will qualify for a mortgage now after our savings and cuts this year?’ Deb asked me. ‘I’m sure we will.’ I replied. ‘We’ve cleared a lot of debt, the business is in good shape and our savings are on the increase. I think it’s time to get back on the property search.’ ‘Right,’ she said, ‘that’s great. What budget do you think we should look at?’ ‘Let’s say 150,000€, I said, ‘things are looking good at the moment.’ So Deb was now looking at a range of properties in the Ontinyent area of Valencia region, with the same criteria as last year but with a slightly increased budget.

‘There are some lovely properties on the market with Mangolink,’ Deb said, ‘and within our budget. What shall we do?’ ‘Let’s take the bull by the horns and get a viewing trip booked.’ I replied. ‘Not a holiday but a few days just viewing properties. However, I think we should look but not make an offer on anything until we find out we can get a mortgage on it.’ ‘Brilliant,’ she said, ‘when?’ I thought about this and said, ‘What about your birthday in February? I think that would be great timing.’ ‘I love it.’ She said. ‘Let’s do it.’

Into December, no week away in the Canaries this year, that was one of the many sacrifices during 2017, but we were going to end the year on a high. We had a hotel booked about 30mins from Ontinyent in February 2018. Deb could only find one hotel in Ontinyent and she didn’t really fancy it. As I mentioned in a previous blog there aren’t that many hotels inland away from popular tourist areas but Deb found the Hotel Rural Castillo de Biar, which is a lovely rustic hotel, bar and restaurant just outside Biar and booked 3 nights. Also a day of viewings with Mangolink Property and a day with Carbonell.

We were back in the game!